| (no subject) |
[Nov. 4th, 2005|12:28 am] |
100 facts
001. Name: Jessica
002. Your Nickname: castelow, castaho
003. Middle Name: ann
004. Place of Birth: shady grove
005. Zodiac Sign: leo
006. Male or Female: FEMALE
007. Your last name: castelow
008. School: fcc
009. Birthday: august 22
010. Residence: some place in frederick or middletown
011. Screen Name: dancebrilliant
__Your Appearance___
012. Hair Color: Brownish reddish
013. Hair Long or Short: short
014. Eye Color: hazel
015. How do ur nails look: short, i bite them
016. Height: 5'4''
017. Do you have a crush on someone: yupp
018. Do you like yourself: of course
019. Smile: a lot
020. Think your skinny: sometimes ecspecially when i am with the babe
021. Piercings: 7
022. Tattoo: yupp, shooting star
023. Righty or Lefty: bothy
___Your 'Firsts'___
024. First Real Kiss: 9th grade
026. First best friend(s): nora and rachel & the guys
027. First award: graduation from pre-school...does taht count?
028. First Sport You Joined: gymastics
029. First pet: dog, buddy :D
030. First vacation: texas
031. First Concert: backstreet boys baby
___ Favorites___
033. Movie:notebook, cruel intentions, zoolander, & a beautiful mind
034. TV Show: laguna beach
035. Color: red
036. Band: hawthorne heights
037. Song: niki fm, forever young, indie rock & roll, and the list goes on
038. Food: rachel's dad's steak
039. Drink: apple juice- doles 50% less sugar
040. Candy: reeses
041. Sport To Play: competition cheerleading and swimming
043. Brand Of Clothing: ae
045. University: shippensburg
046. Animal: cat
047. Book: anything nicholas sparks
048. Magazine: cosmo, teen vouge
___Currently___
049. Eating: nothing
050. Drinking: powerade
051. Money in pocket?: 3 dollars, i am poor
052. Online?: um obviously currently
053. Listening to: nora talk
054. Thinking About: mhh
055. Wanting to: sleep
056. Watching: nothing
057. Wearing: sweat shirt and jeans
_Your Future_
058. Want Kids?: yupp, 3
059. Want to Get Married?: yes
060. Careers in Mind: doctor
__Which is Better With The Opposite Sex___
067. Cute or Sexy: cute
068. Lips or Eyes: lips
069. Hugs or Kisses: kisses
070. Short or Tall: taller than me
071. Easygoing or serious: easy going
072. Romantic or Spontaneous: something spontaneous that is romantic
073. Muscular or Skinny: skinny, but with some muscle
074. Sensitive or Loud: loud, but has the sensitive at times
075. Hook-up or Relationship: relationships
076. Sweet or Caring: both
077. Trouble Maker or Hesitant one: trouble maker who doesnt get caught ;)
___Have You Ever___
078. Kissed a Stranger: yes
079. Drank Bubbles: ew no
080. Lost glasses/contacts: haha all the freaking time
081. Ran Away From Home: yes
082. Broken a Bone: nope
083. Got an X-ray: yes
084. Broken Someones Heart: yea, and still being blamed for his problems
087. Cried When Someone Died: yea
088. Cried At School: yes
___Do You Believe In___
080. God: not really
090. Miracles: yes
091. Love At First Sight: yes
092. Ghosts: yes
093. Aliens: yes
095. Heaven: no
096. Hell: no
098. Kissing on The First Date: yes if the guy is a keeper
099. Horoscopes: sometimes
___Answer Truthfully___
100. Is There Someone You Want: yes |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 21st, 2005|11:53 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | tv | ] |
havent wrote in awhile, maybe because i have been crazy busy hanging with d. boy one.
all week with eachother, 5 hour text message convos, hour long convos on the phone then hanging up and him calling me back because he couldnt sleep :D. but i dont know if he likes me. just sometimes he acts like it other times he doesnt. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 15th, 2005|12:56 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | happy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | hawthorne live on tv | ] |
so yesterday was by far the best day ever.
{l4l came home, d. boy one and i hunnng. all this = ammmmaziness!} |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 11th, 2005|12:15 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | excited l4l comes home! | ] |
| [ | music |
| | tv | ] |
homecoming weekend. love.
everyone that mattered was home this weekend from college =D
friday a lot of people went over to b-rads. parents=gone.
fun fun, $35.28 at mcdonalds which beat the pervious record of $31.42. yay.
let's go for 40 bucks!
saturday, even better. ben's house after homecoming (didn't go to the dance but heard it sucked)
don't really remember the night, which means it was greaaat.
oh and erin and mary got caught, i guess that is what happens when you post pictures of drinking and only some people get caught, one day the others who got away will be caught too. karma, gotta love it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 3rd, 2005|08:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  fucken pissed bc of a tape | ] |
| [ | music |
| | nothing | ] |
mother fucker.
i had a good weekend, got a tattoo, hung out w/ the guys.
then we got wassssted, ha, and they decided i was like a little sister so they could basically beat the shit out of me. not so cool. brusies all over my legs. and then they cuddled me and said sorry and that they loved me. awh <3. then danny slept next to me and cuddled me while he slept...wierd. i barely slept at least not well. so went home didnt have a hang over at the time. took a nap, woke up with the hang over which has lasted through half this day. i went dress shopping with shithead aka the love of my life rachel. we found rachels homecoming dress within 2 minutes of shopping...HOT! it looked so amazing on her. good weekend.
got a rosha shana whatever card from l4l today, HA! made my life. she is really turning into a jew.
dream boy one flirted with me all day, ahhh. love. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 30th, 2005|04:49 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | ecstatic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | nothing | ] |
i got it! finally i got my tattoo, about effing time seriously! i was less nervous for the tat then the piercing...! but yea, its just black and skin, and looks realllllly good! <3 i love it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 28th, 2005|08:17 pm] |
if i told you i loved you
would you go away? |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 27th, 2005|08:46 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | hyper | ] |
| [ | music |
| | ellie typing | ] |
pooop pooop pooop.
iloveyouiloveyou i loooooove you.
damn im hyper, oh and chris lied.
josh saw him today and for some reason i was not shockedddd!
but for some reason i am uber happy but need a drink.
HOLLLLLLLER |
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| you are everything that goes wrong |
[Sep. 27th, 2005|09:47 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  awake | ] |
| [ | music |
| | low life | ] |
i would be sitting pretty
if it wasnt for the shitty grin
on your face.
well, it gets wierder and wierder, chris is in jail...?
he went sunday night.
his friend dan called me from him phone to let me know and said he was supposed to tell me.
yea dunno, moving on still.
<3 |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 26th, 2005|04:10 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the low life | ] |
so it was all bullshit as i had expected, but its straight.
more mad at myself for believing a drug addict.
well i am over it now, thanks for the lesson chris! =D |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 25th, 2005|12:19 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  really effing hurt | ] |
came to a conclusion.
aug 4, look at my LJ entry, i called chris.
he answered
i said wrong number
and hung up.
he was not in jail for the past 4 months or 3 months.
he completely lied to me for the sole purpose of getting in my pants.
i am such a fuck up. |
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| 20 years, a big brick house, nice cars, and two kids |
[Sep. 25th, 2005|11:40 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused | ] |
So chris kept calling me on friday night, until i let him come over to rachels house and talk to me. he came over and we talked for 3 hours about everything. i didnt believe anything he said to me because i mean come on, guys say anything to get in your pants. he had been in jail for 4 months and finally got out, like last week. when i asked him about jail he broke down and was like i am seriously scared straight. which is an improvement from him not giving a shit. so he supposedly been drug free for since he has gotten out, which i am so proud of. then we talked about "us", it was inevitable. i kept telling him he only came over for ass and he said yes that was his inital thought when he called. but then he said once we started talking he had to see me and just sit down and talk to me...? i dunno. anyways he did come over and we did talk. he said he wants to be with me and always wanted to be with me, just that the drugs fucked him up and he pushed me away to stop from hurting me. which i already concluded. then we talked about us having sex after we broke up. i said i did it because i still cared about him and thought having sex would make us have a future, he thought the same. but then after the mark and corey situation, chris had made himself stop caring about me. but sitting in jail he had a lot of time to think, and he claims he thought about us everyday and how much he just wanted to forgive me. and i said to him all i wanted was forgiveness and to know i didnt want them, and he said i know, i realize that now. so he wants me to wait for him while he is back in jail, which will be for a year since be violated probabtion. but i told him i didnt know if i can wait a year and he completely understood. he wants me to visit him in jail too which is going to be hard for him to see me, which he said. he said he doesnt want me to see him like that and it would kill him not to be with me. but if i dont get the 'hi this is the maryland correctional institute' calls then its done for good. because a part of me thinks he said this stuff to me to get in my pants which he did in the end. so i am thinking just to move on. even though i wanted him to come over for closure and he opened so many more doors than what i thought we even had. he was holding me because i was crying and he asked what was i thinking? i said nothing, what are you thinking? he said, "us, in 20 years, a big brick house, nice cars, and two kids". what do i say to that? he wants me to move in with him in 2 years, not rachel and the guys. he said it wont be a house, but it be an apartment and he will make it work for me. i just told him i dunno where either of us will be in 2 years and we can talk about it when it happens. this is what i wanted for so long and now he is back, i am so confused i wish i was l just moving on. why is he doing this to me? |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 20th, 2005|01:35 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | calm | ] |
gosh i like him so much |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 18th, 2005|01:14 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  analytical | ] |
| [ | music |
| | nothing | ] |
visited josh at blockbuster before going to q's to see him bc he is home this weekend.
met a kid named eric through josh, works with him at BB.
i like him, or atleast what i have seen.
josh left me to go smoke and left me alone with eric.
which was not at all a bad experience.
i am really comfortable around him and he is uber funny
oh and in a band and plays every type of guitar possible.
problem? none on the outside
but he is 16, turning 17 soon i presume.
2 years, i mean guys can do it but it just seems different for girls
this sucks
i am so analytical, seriously.
L4L told me to go for it
josh said the same
now if i only get myself to agree,
and trust me in so many ways i do
but in my head i just dont know.
so hypocritical of me i know
because i am always the one that says,
"think with your heart not with your head"
and what am i doing now? |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 13th, 2005|10:50 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  geeky | ] |
| [ | music |
| | tv | ] |
thursday. hopefully. tattoo will be completed on my body, boy do i hope. i think i am going to go to classic electric because everyone keeps telling me how good they are. so after class on thursday me and josh are going =D. rachel dont work and come with me please, thursday is the only day i can go because i work like woah! anywho thats all. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 10th, 2005|11:06 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sikked up | ] |
| [ | music |
| | brand new-sic transit gloria | ] |
Can you feel your heartbeat racing?
Can you taste the fear in her sweat?
You've done this wrong
It's too far gone
These sheets tell of regret
I admit that I'm just a fool for you
I am just a fool for you |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 7th, 2005|08:00 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  haha | ] |
| [ | music |
| | nothing | ] |
let me be blunt,
i need some. and you know what i mean.
yesterday i decided, dream boy number two, i want that penis like woah. and dream boy number one would be a great bf like woah.
3 months is freaking long enough. holler. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 2nd, 2005|07:56 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sick | ] |
| [ | music |
| | csi | ] |
so i am sick. ugh. have to get better by atleast sunday night to go to ship on monday. and gas is like woah, and that sucks as well. oh well what are you gonna do. anywhore i am really pissed that is took our government 5 damn days to help people in the gulf. just not fair at all. what are you going to say about this one mr. president? he just fucked up majorly. and everyone has noticed, democrats and republicans alike, we all know he just fucked up. and you people better donate, they have nothing, they really never did, poor as poor can get and they need our help. they needed it pronto not 5 days after the fact. what is the country coming to honestly. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 30th, 2005|10:06 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | geeky | ] |
| [ | music |
| | nothing | ] |
convinced i met my dream boy, ha or atleast a great model of who he shall be. |
|
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 29th, 2005|04:52 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  annoyed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | rachel bitching | ] |
first day of school. <3 it was good, can't complain. met a chic named amanda saturday night, and she is in my chem lecture and lab. she is really sweet and nice, so a new friend woot. hah. anywho, tino met me outside before my first class, =D made me happy. saw bunches of people from mtown, all middletown high all over again.
speech at 9:30 then english at 11, anthropology at 5:30 ugh. |
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